I certainly hope that Nick, fount of all that is good and holy, is simply toying with Dave before coming in on the side of good. After all, this is a new politics. One where you, the voter, will decide. However, just in case there should be a Con-Lib government in the offing, here are a few good tips in case you ever feel like using your vote again:
1 ABC. Anybody but Cameron. Anybody but the Tories. What is it about politics that you don't understand exactly? Either you vote for a party that takes money from the rich and gives to the poor, or you vote for a party that takes from the poor and gives to the rich. If you ever give your vote to an independent party that gets in bed with Tory Boy, never trust that party again. Ever. Unless by voting Liberal what you really wanted to do, but were too embarassed to say, is that you really want to belong to the rich boys, so you can be at the big table and have lots of money. You were Tory Boy in diguise. Just join the Conservatives and be done with it.
2 Tactical voting. Every Tory gain shows that if Labour and Liberals had voted tactically, the so called progressive vote would have overwhelmed Tory Boy by about 50% to 35%. But no. Lib voters, punch drunk with success, decided that they were going to vote for their leader, to stand up for something. To make a difference. Therefore the Tories have won 96 seats. And the Liberals have lost 6. Mostly to the Tories. What if you were progresiive, were smart, and had voted tactically. Well, it seems you weren't a Liberal. Vote for change. Vote for Tory Boy.
3 The Liberals tied their vote to the party that had the most seats, and the most votes. By pitching himself as half way in between Tory and Labour, and refusing to accept overtures from the Brown camp about their progressive social values, it appears that Nick is just in it for the votes. Andrew Adonis, a former liberal himself, is wrong. The liberals don't care about a freer society (see 1 above). They just want a big seat at the table. Even with Tory Boy.
4 I am not stupid. I accept that first past the post forces a broad swathe of society into silence. The Liberals were supposed to be the conscience of Labour. Wasteful ID Cards are bad and expensive (Although Nick, if your policy on immigration is to count everybody who leaves the country, then perhaps you could be a little more explicit about what your data is going to be based upon (a) pencil and paper and therefore more state jobs working for the border agency or (b) much as I hate it, a smart card ). Complicity in torture is execrable (and by the way Nick, the Human Rights Act which we British co-founded after the war, is something Tory Boy hates. He wants a charter of rights and responsibilities. Anything to to water down the directly applicable statute voted in by Labour. Just so you know). An amnesty to the estimated 500,000 illegals living and working in our economy might be something you might be able to sell to Tory Boy. It costs a lot of money to deport people. But somehow I don't think you really care about the black economy. I think that you will chop and change. Let's face it. foreigners without papers don't vote, and you don't really care abou them.
5 Bad as Labour have been, they have installed- the minimum wage, the Human Rights Act, financial redistribution to the poor, an immigration amnesty, equality legislation, dramatic reduction of child poverty, both in relevant and absolute terms, matrnity elislation, paternity rights . We thought that you were going to come in to government with us, and you were going to help us to paper over the holes that we might have left. But no. You were weak at the knees from the syren song of power. Let me give you a good piece of advice. When you sup with Tory Boy, use a long spoon. Otherwise you might feel terrible about your self.
5 IAll you ever wanted to do was change the system. make it more responsive to the will of the people. But it turns out that the only reason to change the voting system, and make it more fair, is to enable you to get more votes. The trouble is Nick, have you thought about rule 1. Do your really care about the bottom line? You see, I can really get excited about your schtick until it seems that your mandate from the people translates itswelf into a cynical clique that only cares about looking good, and hanging with Tory Boy.